TRUSTING THE UNEXPECTED PRESENT
"Sacrifice and offering you did not desire, but a body you prepared for me; in holocausts and sin offerings you took no delight. Then I said, 'As is written of me in the scroll, behold, I come to do your will, O God.'" – Heb. 10:5-7
If only it were this easy. If an angel suddenly appeared to me and told me what my future purpose would be, I’m not sure how I would react. I would probably be in more disbelief than anything else and then come up with a line of reasoning for how it could not possibly really come true.
Mary so naturally however responds with such grace in today’s Gospel reading: “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word.” How much faith, trust, and humility she must have possessed to be able to respond in such a way! It begs the question for me of how one moves from fear to trust – and consistently. Surely after the news, Mary still encountered events that were beyond her understanding, all the way through her Son’s crucifixion and resurrection. Yet, she remained unwavering in her faith, well beyond what she could see.
But to take that leap from fear, from the unknown, to trust and faith? How to move, how to follow, when you can’t actually see what will come? I have found myself in situation after situation that quite squarely forces me to deal with this. It’s never comfortable. I’m always hesitant at best, if not completely brushing it off at first. Then somehow, God does something in my heart that opens me up little by little to take another look. Soon that next look becomes an avenue to exploring – and how scary could it be just to explore something? Somehow after that, I find myself down a pathway, an opening, an opportunity I never could have imagined. Somehow it also seems to fit me perfectly – better than I knew myself – because of course, God did. By then I’m bursting with uncontainable excitement and joy. Each time now, I’d like to think it takes me a little less time to make that shift. Perhaps one day I will be able to respond as swiftly and gracefully as Mary, not so much by way of speed but by way of trusting in the moment. In the meantime, I can still hope to be inspired by her gentle, unwavering courage.
Lord, how are you inviting me to step into deeper trust with you today? In what ways might I delight in trusting this present moment?
Quyen (Nhi) Ngo