Embracing Judas with Love
It is no surprise to us that the Passion of Christ begins with the story of betrayal. We all know the lore of Judas, the infamous friend turned enemy. I am drawn to the moment Judas asks in the Gospel for today, “What are you willing to give me if I hand him over to you?” To me reveals that this was a premeditated betrayal rooted in Judas’ selfishness. It is easy to place myself in the shoes of Jesus because I have been betrayed by friends before. It is much harder to place myself in the shoes of Judas because it is uncomfortable to acknowledge my selfishness. I don’t think of myself that way, but in the past, my selfishness has led to the death of a friendship. The insidiousness of this sin makes it so that we might feel blindsided when we face the consequences of our selfish actions. I have learned that authentic relationships challenge the ego, the part of us that is always seeking our own interest before the interests of others, the Judas within.
I like to imagine what would have happened if Judas had asked for forgiveness. If he had come clean, would that have changed the story? I do not know, but in my imagination I see Jesus embrace Judas in a big bear hug with the love the Psalmist describes in today's Psalm. What I find most disarming about an authentic relationship with Jesus is the way he loves every single person. The little Judas in me can be at peace knowing that Jesus loves me knowing I can be selfish and still calls me to be close friends with him. In my prayer, I flip Judas’ question with Jesus, what am I willing to give, in order to grow closer to Love? I pray he strengthens me to love him a little more each and every day.
Jesus, you know our hearts. Teach us how to follow you. Forgive our selfish ways and give us courage to help us amend what we may have broken. May your love strengthen our will to do good each day. Amen.
Ana Lopez