Liminal Space
…he is not here… - Mark 16:6
I’d never realized that these words about Jesus’ whereabouts appeared in the Easter Gospel. On Holy Saturday, the words are louder to me than what’s written before and after. In full context, these words are spoken on the original Easter Sunday by the angel at Jesus’ empty tomb: “He has been raised; he is not here.”
In the Ignatian examen, we are invited to answer the question, “Where’s God.” Today, I find myself revisiting so many moments in my life where my answer was “I don’t know.”
There is nothing more unsettling than not knowing where God is. Sometimes, I don’t even know where to look.
I remember an Easter Vigil mass during a time of deep desolation when I was in and out of consciousness through the eight readings preceding the Gospel in a cathedral that felt empty. The lights were dim. The strangers next to me seemed to be in a trance, inaccessible. The light signifying the true presence of Jesus at the altar had been extinguished indicating an empty tabernacle. I felt that absence acutely. I felt such disconnection. This experience is a microcosm for so many seasons in my life.
The many readings today take us through a tapestry of events where desolation, hopelessness and confusion are the necessary starting point for what comes next. Perhaps this liminal space is then cause for hope. But what do we do when we feel stuck in it? How long do we have to wait here? Days? Weeks? Years? Even decades?
In the Epistle from Romans today, Paul writes: “Are you unaware that we who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death?”
Even Jesus asked why God, the Father, had forsaken him. But we know the rest of the story. Even the darkest signposts in our lives might be indications that somehow, despite it all, if we could somehow continue to seek God, we are “going the right way.”
I have a mantra that grounds me because it invites me to trust God in my present moment: “One impossible thing at a time.”
If we could stay in the present and pray for the faith to do the very next best thing, no matter how small, to take even a single step toward God, I think we can meet God there, wherever it is he’s calling us to. So, while God might not be here… maybe he’s just right over there.
As the Gospel concludes…
“But go…
He is going before you…
…there you will see him, as he told you.”
God of all creation, lead us home to you. Home is wherever you are.
Kevin Izquierdo