A LOVE STORY
“Do you realize what I have done for you?
You call me ‘teacher’ and ‘master,’ and rightly so, for indeed I am.
If I, therefore, the master and teacher, have washed your feet,
you ought to wash one another’s feet.
I have given you a model to follow,
so that as I have done for you, you should also do.”
When I was dating my husband, we washed the feet of his parents during a foot washing ceremony. He is an only child and while washing his mom’s feet, she heard God tell her it was time to let him go. We got engaged shortly thereafter. We now have 3 beautiful children - 1 in heaven and 2 here on Earth. Writing that out, it sounds picturesque.
However, the complete story is that 2020 got the best of us - the pandemic, protests, and elections. It magnified the differences between her and I. The holidays were tense and hurtful. Past pain that had been swept under the rug, resurfaced. Then, she got COVID and passed away. Days before being intubated, we messaged our ‘I love you’s.” She called me her dear daughter. My grief has been deep and complex. This Lenten season I wanted to fast from the unforgive-ness I felt towards her.
Every day I prayed. When Jesus invited me to hand over my hurt, I did. That also may sound picturesque. But what it practically looked like was that every time I was confronted with the weight of the pain that was caused, I stopped and in plain English spelled it out for Jesus - what happened and how it made me feel. There were cuss words. Jesus said he could take it.
Now, in Holy Week, this reading is like a summit for me. Every time I gave Jesus a painful memory, He reminded me of a loving one. Her taking care of me after our daughter was born. Her babysitting so my husband and I could have a date night. Her having open, honest, and vulnerable conversations with me about her own struggles in life and love. Somehow, I had forgotten. Maybe we both did. But, Jesus did not.
Today’s reading is a reminder to me that Jesus loves me, loves her, that her and I love each other and in Him we are in communion with one another. Always.
Jesus, when life gets the best of us, remind us that within your story of crucifixion and resurrection, there is the night before it all happened, when you spelled it out for all of us, all of this is because you love us. Amen.
Anonymous
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